THE RITE

CAROLINE: Sir Anthony Hopkins’s latest thriller is called The Rite and it’s his turn to make an exorcist movie, apparently. I couldn’t bring myself to care. Was it any good?

RYAN: In short, no.

CAROLINE: Glad I dodged the bullet! Care to elaborate?

RYAN: It was long, slow and rather boring. My guest Jonathan said it was about an hour and forty-five minutes too long and it’s total run time is just barely longer than that.

CAROLINE: Ouch. You can’t have expected much though. It’s still a January release.

RYAN: True. But Hannibal Lecter! And there were a couple creepy looks or moments from Sir Antony, but nothing authentically scary.

CAROLINE: How disappointing.

RYAN: I know. A non-scary horror movie is as perturbing as an unfunny comedy.

CAROLINE: Neither is a choice film going experience.

RYAN: There’s also just a sad lack of style to the film. Some of the effects were okay – mostly just warped body movements and sound effects though. But the camera work was just very straightforward and bland.

CAROLINE: Who else is in it?

RYAN: There is some fine casting. Ciaran Hinds, Toby Jones and Rutger Hauer each have bit moments.

CAROLINE: Who’s the main priest guy?

RYAN: His name is Colin O’Donoghue and he’s so miscast! He’s only done TV before this and he just doesn’t fit. He was almost too pretty for the role or something and he completely lacks depth.

CAROLINE: Not good.

— BOTTOM LINE —

RYAN: I love scary movies but they have to actually be frightening. I did tense up a couple times but really only because of the way the editing manipulates you. The movie is supposedly inspired by true events; a couple priests portrayed in the film… but I’m sorry. I don’t buy it at all. And neither should you.

— RATING —