SUCKER PUNCH
RYAN: Sucker Punch is a new blockbuster which is coming out in a decidedly non-blockbuster time of year, and I don’t think it’s going to do very well. It’s pretty convoluted.
CAROLINE: It’s from director Zack Snyder who had a lot of success with 300 and then less luck with Watchmen, which I kind of hated.
RYAN: It stars the girl from the Lemony Snicket movies, as well as Jena Malone, Vanessa Hudgens, Abbie Cornish, Carla Gugino with a questionable accent and a cameo from Jon Hamm.
CAROLINE: I have a little girl crush on Abbie Cornish. She’s gorgeous and has a hot bod, and I love that she’s not emaciated Hollywood skinny.
RYAN: She’s a little bit older and bigger than the other girls in the movie, but she’s stunning.
CAROLINE: What on earth is Vanessa Hudgens doing in this movie? She can’t act and she was mumbling most of the time. I couldn’t understand half the stuff she said.
RYAN: I know, and this is her second movie this month after Beastly. I guess she’s trying to keep up with Zac Efron’s career. There’s theoretically a lot going for this movie – it’s highly stylized, it’s got great costumes and makeup, the set design is cool and opening scene is incredible – but it’s pretty painful.
CAROLINE: I hear what you’re saying about the good elements, but none of it worked for me. It’s got the feel of a comic book movie, but it’s not based on a comic book. I couldn’t get into one frame of it.
RYAN: I liked all of the elements I just mentioned but the story really ruined the movie for me. It’s so sad and painful, especially at the very beginning and end. I was upset by it, so I can’t imagine what the target audience of younger people is going to think.
CAROLINE: It’s a really dark movie, both literally and figuratively.
RYAN: But not dark in a Harry Potter movie way, like spooky and creepy. It’s just flat-out disturbing.
CAROLINE: Well, it’s about a mental institute in the ’60s, so there’s a touch of Shutter Island going on.
RYAN: It’s a big special effects spectacle, and it even had some war movie moments, which I really didn’t appreciate.
CAROLINE: For me it was like Kill Bill meets Burlesque with a dash of Chicago thrown in, in a far inferior movie. The fantasy sequences were so awful that I actually got up to pee when I didn’t really have to just to avoid watching one of them. And the volume got so freaking loud during those scenes, I could barely hear myself think. Truly awful.
RYAN: The girl behind me was kicking the back of my seat the whole time too, so that didn’t really enhance my movie-going experience.
CAROLINE: I appreciate the girl power theme and I liked these actresses with the exception of Vanessa Hudgens, but at the end of the day I just didn’t care about these characters or what happened to them. The movie basically has no point.
RYAN: I didn’t really care who lived or died, which isn’t a good thing. Zack Snyder needs to try a little harder next time.
— BOTTOM LINE —
RYAN: Since I had to see this movie, I guess I’m glad I saw it on the big screen; but I wouldn’t recommend doing that or even renting it. It has a good message, but ultimately it’s wrapped in such a sad, disturbing package that it’s just not worth it.
CAROLINE: I didn’t mind the sad story so much as the fact that it’s not a good movie. The fantasy sequences were overblown, pointless and way too long. I was bored throughout. I wouldn’t recommend this movie for anyone.
— RATING —
