Ouija Review
RYAN: I fully predicted this movie would be a disappointment, though I always hope out hope for horror movies because I really like them – when they’re scary – and alas, this one isn’t.
CAROLINE: I find that hard to believe, because the commercial freaks me out. But I know you have a certain level of expectation for cinematic scary. Why didn’t this measure up?
RYAN: It;s the most basic request in a horror movie to be scary and although there is some imagery at the end that is creepy, this movie is not scary, unless maybe you’re 4 years old.
CAROLINE: (laughs) Ok.
RYAN: There are a few jumps but they’re just because of the editing and the sound effects. It’s such a boring movie. It actually feels more like a Halloween themed After School Special than a movie.
CAROLINE: It’s too bad. You think with a subject like the Ouija board, there could have been something more to it.
RYAN: They tried but the story is cliche and derivative. They’re dealing with a haunting, of course, and it’s just tedious. The movie is an hour and a half but feels like three hours because there are scenes with dialogue and then these scenes of ominous, moody music.
CAROLINE: How’s the cast?
RYAN: Strange. There’s really no one of note in it except Daren Kagasoff, formerly Shailene Woodley’s costar on TV’s The Secret Life of the American Teenager.
CAROLINE: No clue.
RYAN: But they all act like they’re on muscle relaxers, which also slowed the movie down.
CAROLINE: (laughs) That’s so odd.
RYAN: It’s also sometimes frustrating because these crazy things happen and then in the very next scene everyone’s acting like nothing happened. Or they go into a room and don’t turn a light on, or other obviously stupid things. It just doesn’t work at all.
CAROLINE: Yeah sounds like a mess of a movie.
RYAN: Please skip this one. The last thing we need next year is Ouija 2.
