Noah Review

RYAN:There’s been much ado about Noah so I’d been eagerly anticipating it and after extremely limited press screenings, added by Paramount Pictures at the last minute, it’s finally showing up in theaters!  It certainly delivers on my visual expectations set up by the trailer.  The effects are very good.  It’s a spectacle and it’s so epic!  I’ve never read the bible and I barely remember the story of Noah from childhood, but there are clearly original story elements added for dramatic effect.  But it’s not a direct adaptation from the bible.

ERIN: …which is what part of the controversy surrounding this film stems from.  It’s been rumored to have upset church groups at early promotional screenings… and now after seeing it, you can understand why.  The basic story of Noah is not a mystery but is basic – God calls upon him to build the arc to start over, saving only two of each spices whilst wiping out the rest of the world… it’s a do-over and a tale of renewal, repopulation.  That in of itself doesn’t make any sense and this movie doesn’t help any of that.

RYAN: I wasn’t confused but there are a lot of subplots which we won’t reveal since I don’t do spoilers.  But I will say I love this cast.  But Emma Watson is the highlight.  She shows such range and goes so deep that lil Hermione really impressed me in this, not to mention she’s gorgeous.

ERIN: I completely agree and Jennifer Connelly is beautiful too.

RYAN: She’s always been one of my favorites and wow – she had one intensely dramatic scene that almost had me cheering for her.

ERIN: They both really carried the movie.  It should have been Russell Crowe – he’s the God-serving man he’s supposed to be but…

RYAN: …but he’s still Russell Crowe.  I’ve had a hard time with him lately.  I liked him better recently in Winter’s Tale.  He actually had a brief singing moment in this where I thought, “Um, didn’t read the reviews from Les Mis? Don’t sing, Russell.”  I know he’s a musical guy but it still doesn’t translate to screen well for him.

ERIN: (laughs) Exactly. Somebody made him sing.

RYAN: That somebody is Darren Aronofsky who wrote and directed this.  It’s his first film since directing Black Swan, which was genius.  This movie has some genius visual elements but it’s no Black Swan.  It’s not even in the same caliber as that movie.  Not really fair to compare since this is a major mainstream blockbuster and BS was an indie.  But they are from the same man and this one is equally disturbing – some of the scenes here are brutal, but LBH, let’s be honest, there was brutality and sacrifice in the bible… that I do remember learning about.

ERIN: Oh so much!  And yeah this movie is really dark and has weird gory moments.

RYAN: Darren is still a brilliant director and it’s cool to see him work with something so epic, even it it’s waaaaay overly drawn out.

ERIN: Whoa – it’s so way too long!

RYAN: Some that they could have easily cut out, but I still really enjoyed, was a lot of the story of creation.  It wasn’t that germane to this story but I liked those moments anyway.  Still it’s over two hours and could have been under.

ERIN: I completely agree.  Much of the bible storyline seemed like fantasy and magical.  But I suppose it really is.  It’s hard to view in our world where things like that don’t appear to occur.  I can see what the church would be bothered by this movie.

RYAN: Yeah Adam and Eve were glowing.

ERIN: (laughs) Yeah there are some interesting stylistic choices.

RYAN: I enjoyed seeing Logan Lerman in this and of course Anthony Hopkins.

ERIN: It’s so long I did get a little bored.  It’s like Titanic, in the sense that you know what’s going to happen and you’re just waiting to get to it.

RYAN: One hundred percent.  There are really two different movies here.  There’s Noah’s Arc and then all these other subplots woven in to add action and drama.  It may polarize fans of the book, and the effects are big-screen-worthy, but it’s not a home run of a movie.

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