CORIOLANUS

RYAN: I’m so over this movie before even beginning to talk about it.

CAROLINE: Oh no. Why’s that?

RYAN: Well for starters, there are a lot of war scenes. And I hate war as a genre and this is very violent and bloody; and then there’s the Shakespeare element.

CAROLINE: But we can handle Shakespeare.

RYAN: It’s true. I can even love it but I don’t have the familiarity with this story the way we do with Romeo, Midsummer Night’s Dream, etc…

CAROLINE: That makes sense. I didn’t get the chance to see this.

RYAN: Honey, please don’t. It’s, like, annoying. I could barely pay attention to it.

CAROLINE: Oh gawd, it sounds heinous.

RYAN: I appreciate the production value. It’s a decent production and the cast, well, I like them but they were not entirely watchable in this. I used to think I could watch my favorite actors in anything but now I have to reconsider that notion.

CAROLINE: Wow. Okay. So it’s Ralph Fiennes, Gerard Butler, Jessica Chastain, and Vanessa Redgrave, anyone else?

RYAN: That’s really it for the recognizable folk. It’s mostly Ralph’s film.

CAROLINE: Well I certainly don’t think I’m going to be seeing this one.

RYAN: It’s absolutely one of those movies where you’re like, “I wish I could get that time back.” I’m sure there’s someone out there who this may appeal to, whether it’s the diehard Shakespeare fan or just the intent on conflict/war buff, but it’s probably the last thing I would ever wanna sit through again. Painful.

— RATING —