COUNTRY STRONG
CAROLINE: Country Strong is the new Gwyneth Paltrow movie in which she stuns and awes us all with her incredible singing voice. And you may remember she performed the movie’s title track at the CMAs last year.
RYAN: Of course! She did a great job.
CAROLINE: She looked nervous as hell, but she sounded pretty good. Though we already knew she could sing from that train wreck of a movie, Duets, that her dad directed years ago.
RYAN: I was sadly unable to attend the screening of Country Strong with you but am considering shelling out mine own $13 to see it this weekend. You know how I adore a movie musical. Is it worth it?
CAROLINE: Honestly, it’s not worth your money in the theater. It’s basically a Lifetime movie that happens to star an Oscar winning actress. But given your personal love of movies with singing, it might be worthwhile for you.
RYAN: Oh no, I’m bummed. I wanted it to be really good.
CAROLINE: Honey, it’s a January release! It didn’t have a chance in hell of being really good.
RYAN: But didn’t it have an awards qualifying run in late December?
CAROLINE: Yes, but I’m convinced that the only reason they did that was so Gwyneth wouldn’t be humiliated that she had a January release on her hands. And the only nomination the movie has gotten so far is for Best Original Song.
RYAN: All right, so what’s so bad about it?
CAROLINE: Well, it’s not the worst thing I’ve ever seen, and I did enjoy the music, but it’s sooooo cheesy. Gwyneth’s character is such a hot mess that I actually hated her at times. She’s a whiny, indulgent, self-pitying, drunk country music star who shamelessly cheats on her husband, who’s played by Tim McGraw. And what happens at the end is bananas, but I won’t tell you what it is.
RYAN: Is Gwyneth good at least?
CAROLINE: Sure. And she sings very well too. She allows herself to look a little undone in the movie – bad makeup, messy hair, etc. – which is necessary for the character. She looks thin to me though. Her face is drawn, and I think she’d look younger and prettier with a little more weight on her.
RYAN: Speaking of younger, Leighton Meester from TV’s Gossip Girl plays the ingenue on tour with her. How does she do?
CAROLINE: She’s pretty good, and her voice is nice too. I really liked the lead guy though, who was also just in TRON: Legacy. He’s very hot and totally reminded me of Brad Pitt in Thelma & Louise. He’s totally believable as a country singer, but apparently he’d never sung or played the guitar before making this movie, which shocked me.
RYAN: So it sounds like there are some good things about the movie. I think I might like it.
CAROLINE: Don’t get your hopes up, honey. Go in with low expectations and you might enjoy it, but there’s no getting around its cheesiness. This is a glorified TV movie at best. Not sure why Gwyneth wanted to be in a flick with a bunch of B-listers and virtual unknowns, but maybe she just really wanted to sing.
— BOTTOM LINE —
CAROLINE: This movie didn’t disappoint me because I wasn’t expecting much from it, but it’s really lame in parts. If it didn’t have some decent singing, I probably would have hated it. The story is melodramatic and overwrought, and the ending is kind of insane. Plus it went on about 15 minutes too long. I thought it ended two or three times but it kept going. Country music fans will no doubt flock to see it, but for the rest of us, it’s über cheese.
— RATING —
