SMOKIN’ ACES
RYAN: We just saw “Smokin’ Aces” and…
CAROLINE: It’s really bloody.
RYAN: Well, it gets bloody eventually. But overall, it’s not bloody.
CAROLINE: What crack are you smoking? That was one of the biggest bloodbaths I’ve ever seen in my life.
RYAN: I’ve seen bloodier.
CAROLINE: Have some perspective. The gun violence in this was unbelievable.
RYAN: It wasn’t any more violent than “The Departed.”
CAROLINE: Yes, but this was bad people violence.
RYAN: True. But I’m very pleased to report that this was a decent January release. Universal is throwing us a good movie early in the year.
CAROLINE: It was fast-paced and fun, and it had a great cast. Even Ben Affleck was good. He had creative facial hair.
RYAN: Honey, everyone was good in this – even Alicia Keys held her own weight.
CAROLINE: Well, she didn’t have to do much other than talk like a ‘ho.
RYAN: [laughs’ It’s true. One of the things I liked best about this film is that unlike most movies of this genre, it had some roles for women in it. They weren’t just ornaments – they got a piece of the action. Granted, they were referred to as bitches most of the time.
CAROLINE: Yes, most of the women in this film are hookers. But two of them get to play bad guys, one of whom is Alicia Keys.
RYAN: And I have to say, Andy Garcia is aging nicely.
CAROLINE: He does look good. Sadly, he can’t quite shake that Cuban accent of his, though he tried valiantly in this film.
RYAN: And he came across as Southern.
CAROLINE: It was a little weird.
RYAN: I would have liked to have swapped out Ryan Reynolds for a Josh Hartnett or someone else.
CAROLINE: Are you kidding? I loved Ryan Reynolds in this! I thought he was amazing, and he’s so hot.
RYAN: I thought he was great but every time he came onscreen, I thought “Van Wilder.” He came off as a dorky, comic, college guy trying to play serious.
CAROLINE: Wow. You saw “Van Wilder”? Perhaps that was a mistake.
RYAN: I know. My bad.
CAROLINE: What about Ray Liotta? So good!
RYAN: He was excellent in this movie. He’s always so good.
CAROLINE: Totally. Bottom line?
RYAN: It’s a great story and the action is paced very well. It’s not too long and it’s not over-your-head complicated. I did have to pay attention, but I liked that.
CAROLINE: There were a lot of twists and turns, especially towards the end. It’s a really high energy movie, but I gotta warn you, ladies – it’s really, really bloody and there’s a lot of gratuitous gun violence, and if that’s not your bag, then this isn’t the movie for you.
RYAN: Hallelujah.