2007 Golden Globe Awards
RYAN: Tonight was everything I hoped it would be and more.
CAROLINE: Another Golden Globes has passed and it did not disappoint. It was rife with near stumbles…
RYAN:…not to mention some actual stumbles…
CAROLINE:…and some truly tragic outfits.
RYAN: Certain actresses put the “ass” in “disaster.”
CAROLINE: Namely Vanessa Williams who looked as though Christina Aguilera from the Lady Marmalade video vomited on her.
RYAN: Like she was wearing a hairball that Xtina had just coughed up.
CAROLINE: She reminded me of that tragic hair that Kate Hudson had at the Oscars when she was nominated for “Almost Famous.” But never fear, because there were some gorgeous gals too.
RYAN: Who was your favorite?
CAROLINE: I thought Eva Longoria looked fabulous and Reese looked young and fresh but I fear she’s joined the ranks of Kate Bosworth and Keira Knightley. I guess the divorce is taking a toll.
RYAN: Yes, she’s emancipated. But my best dressed of the night is Cate Blanchett.
CAROLINE: And for the older gals, I thought Helen Mirren was representin’. Also, Jenny Garner and Ben Affleck were a fab-looking couple, second only to Brangelina.
RYAN: For sure. I’d like to start by saying that I called it and I feel validated after your disagreements of the last several weeks – “Dreamgirls” is a winner! Best Picture, Best Supporting Actor and Best Supporting Actress.
CAROLINE: Doesn’t mean it’s a good movie, Ryan.
RYAN: Yes, it does.
CAROLINE: Yeah, not so much. Jennifer Hudson didn’t deserve to win, her speech was way too long and she almost fell coming up the stairs, which was phenomenal. One of the funniest moments of the night.
RYAN: She deserved to win for Best Actress, not Supporting Actress. She was the one real kid giving a speech and I was really moved by what she said.
CAROLINE: I predict certain death for her career after she gets nominated for an Oscar and possibly wins. No one will ever see or hear from her again.
RYAN: The last thing I’ll say on the topic is that she’ll have a huge recording career no matter what. Moving on, someone who did actually stumble, hilariously, was the very drunk…
CAROLINE: Dustin Hoffman. Too funny. He almost fell over whilst just standing there.
RYAN: Any other observations?
CAROLINE: I’m thrilled that “Babel” won Best Picture. But my biggest hope for the night was that I would not only get to see Sacha Baron Cohen in a tuxedo as his usual hot self, but also that he would win and I would get to hear him speak in his normal voice. And God, it was everything I’d hoped for and more.
RYAN: He was great but if you had to choose between him and Clive Owen?
CAROLINE: Clive still wins but Sacha is a close second.
RYAN: I, for one, was outraged at the world’s worst acceptance speech ever, by one Forest Whitaker.
CAROLINE: It was shocking and embarrassing. And knowing that the show is about to end and they’re already running over, the fact that he couldn’t get his s—t together and had to wait thirty seconds before starting his speech was ridiculous. And then he mumbled the whole thing.
RYAN: It was a debacle, and he’s an embarrassment to himself and Hollywood.
CAROLINE: [laughs’]
RYAN: I’m also a little bit outraged that Meryl Streep won for Best Actress when she really had a supporting role in “The Devil Wears Prada,” and I really wanted Toni Collette to win.
CAROLINE: I did love her speech though. She’s hilarious, and you can never be upset when Meryl wins.
RYAN: Overall, I have to say that last night’s show may as well have been broadcast in black and white because almost every girl was wearing white.
CAROLINE: That was weird. Even pale girls like me who shouldn’t wear white were wearing it. So I’d like to say kudos to Naomi Watts for that smashing blue dress.
RYAN: Exactly. Well, at least the awards won’t be destroying any marriages this year like last year’s Witherspoon-Phillippe problem.
CAROLINE: Some of the speeches were way too long.
RYAN: I liked how whenever they cut to a shot of Annette Bening, she was drinking.
CAROLINE: Her dress was tragic.
RYAN: How about Renee Zellweger? It actually hurt my eyes to look at her.
CAROLINE: Since when has it been easy to look at Renee? She must be living hard because her face is showing some serious wear and tear. And she is homely with a capital L.
RYAN: Our next big event to look forward to is the announcement of the Academy Awards nominations.
CAROLINE: Coming on January 23rd to a Today show near you.
RYAN: I can’t wait! I hope you all enjoyed the GGs as much as we did. Here’s looking at you, Oscar!