2007 Academy Awards Show
8:40 PM
RYAN: Shout out to my sister, Ellen! You look great.
CAROLINE: Would it kill her to put on a gown? Even once?
RYAN: Honey, she’s a poster girl for butch-glamour-lez.CAROLINE: Sorry, but her opening monologue was kind of a snooze.
8:46 PM
CAROLINE: Our first screw up of the evening!!
RYAN: We love it. Nice pronunciation, Nicole “Dreamgwirls” Kidman. But whatever – she looks incredible.
8:56 PMCAROLINE: Will Ferrell, Jack Black, John C. Reilly – finally, something original!
9:00 PM
RYAN: OMG! Will Smith Jr. a) shouldn’t be presenting and b) just made Nikki Kidman look like a Rhodes Scholar with his screw up!
CAROLINE: That was classic. Nice Jeri Curl, kiddo.
9:21 PM
RYAN: Okay. It’s about this time I’m beginning to regret they didn’t start with some big awards. I mean c’mon. Let’s say it together: “Yawn.”
9:22 PM
RYAN: I may have spoken too soon. Best Supporting Actor! Bring it on!
9:24 PM
CAROLINE: Omg. Alan Arkin just kicked Eddie’s ass. It’s the upset we’ve all been waiting for. I hate to say “I told you so,” Ryan, but…
RYAN: My stomach just fell out of my body. I thought for SURE Eddie Murphy was in. Put Eddie on suicide watch tonight!
9:32 PM
CAROLINE [In best Chandler Bing voice’: Could Al Gore be any fatter?
RYAN: Um, no.
9:45 PM
RYAN: Oh dear. The winner from “Happy Feet” actually looks like a penguin!
10:01 PM
RYAN: (laughs) Anne Hathaway and Emily Blunt’s awards presentation with Meryl Streep was HI-larious!
CAROLINE: Meryl’s comic timing is perfection. But what is she wearing? She looks like a witchay woman.
10:06 PM
RYAN: Open letter to Tom Cruise: You’re so holier than thou. Why are you so stuck up? You’re the new Michael Jackson. Why not just admit you’re the father of Anna Nicole Smith’s baby and chillax.
10:14 PM
CAROLINE: We get it, Gwyneth. You’re fluent in Spanish.
10:31 PM
CAROLINE: Let’s take a moment for my boy, Clive. He’s so unbelievably hot. What do you think about his tieless look?RYAN: He’s so casual, I love it. I wish more men dressed like that.
10:35 PM
CAROLINE: And in a stunning turn of events, Jennifer Hudson wins. Snore. Love her feigned look of surprise upon winning.
RYAN: WHAT?!?! I mean, couldn’t she have prepared a speech? Come on! You knew you were going to win, J. Hud. That being said, I’m not surprised, but thrilled. My inner gay is celebrating this win for the musicals!!
CAROLINE: Your inner gay? I can only begin to imagine what your outer gay looks like. But I have one prediction – tonight marks the demise of Jennifer Hudson’s career.
RYAN: Oh for schnitzle-weezle! As sure as Ryan and Reese’s marriage ended with her win last year for Best Actress, J. Hud will have no career in acting after this evening. How’ere, I predict she will have huge success as a recording artist.
Joshua February 26, 2007
I like the dance troupe inserts; very cute. But that intro was ackward…
Jessica February 26, 2007
I have to (respectfully) disagree with A LOT here. Will Smith Jr was beyond adorable. It was so cute – he is just young! Didn’t even notice Nicole. And I LOVED Ellen’s opening intro. May I also add: Short Film winner guy’s speech was great, Mark Walhberg is SO hot, Alan Arkin killed the excitement of being the underdog with a written/terribly delivered speech.
Anonymous February 26, 2007
Just tuned in and saw Alan win – AWESOME But I am bored already – and according to live blog – I didn’t miss anything.
Anonymous February 26, 2007
Seriously – I am snoozing – PS – who let Gywenith back in the US?
Joshua February 26, 2007
Jessica, I agree with you about Will Smith Jr. That whole sequence was cute. Ellen is OK; neither a total flop nor hysterical.I’ve definitely seen her be MUCH funnier.
Joshua February 26, 2007
OMG Meryl Streep gives the SCARIEST looks.
Ryaline (Ryan & Caroline) February 26, 2007
Joshua & Jessice:You’re our two favorite J-Friends!!Loving your comments!xx Ryaline(Ryan & Caroline)
Jessica February 26, 2007
I appreciate that, Josh.WOW Emily Blunt! Gorge. But that whole costume design reenactment thing was upsetting and freakly.BTW, I am asskicking in my pool. I know I’ll start losing now that I’ve said that, but so far my only problem was Eddie Murphy. I should say that I sought out professional counsel on my picks this year from Ryaline. I am gay for Ellen.
Michael S. February 26, 2007
“Ellen is a little edgier than most hosts, but it’s working, you know?”(as dictated to Jessica). “No, I don’t have any comments on outfits.”
Joshua February 26, 2007
Seriously; the costume thing was SUPER-weird. I liked the idea but the execution was embarassing. Maybe if they didn’t like like animatronics on the fritz…
Greg February 26, 2007
You guys are the best! Even better than the actual program…
Joshua February 26, 2007
Robert Downey Jr inspires me to do drugs. Can I just say that? Very funny man.
Jessica February 26, 2007
I think I’m gay for Josh! We have SO been on the same page.
Joshua February 26, 2007
OK, Jessica, so you have to help me out now. For my own blog: http://www.star1057fm.com/pages/joshuab.html I’m trying to put together a “Top 5 Oscar Moments So Far”. Here’s what I have…Top 5 Oscar Moments:1) Will Smith Jr. screws up his speech (in a cutesly little kid kinda way.)2) Meryl Streep gives her “Miranda” look of death when Anne Hathaway doesn’t bring her her a cappacino when she comes out to present an Oscar.3) Robert Downey Jr. says:”Visual effects: they enable us to see aliens, experience other universes, move in slow motion, or watch spiders climbing high above the city landscape. For me, just a typical weeknight in the mid 90s.”4) Ellen asks Steven Spielberg to take a photo of her for MySpace.Suggestions??
Anonymous February 26, 2007
Cheers for Jennifer Hudson and even louder cheers for her shouting out Jennifer Holiday’s name at the end of her acceptance speech.Also – what was Anne Hathaway wearing??? I hate Gwenyth what ever her name is.
Anonymous February 26, 2007
OMG – Jerry Seinfield is alive?
Jessica February 26, 2007
Josh/Joshua – I don’t even know you but I will help you.5. Disembodied female emcee voice regaling us with some random anecdote from childhood each time a winner is announced. What is that???6. Eddie Murphy’s “suicide watch” (I quote Ryan)facial expression at losing Best Supporting Actor to Alan “I just won for best supporting actor but I can’t string two sentences together by heart OR even when reading from this piece of paper” Arkin.7. CLIVE OWEN.
Anonymous February 26, 2007
AL GORE FOR PRESIDENT
Anonymous February 26, 2007
Clint is in trouble – I feel a Lauren Bacall happening her
Joshua February 26, 2007
I would turn gay for Al Gore. Wait, I am gay. Oh God, I’m frightened. I take it back.
Joshua February 26, 2007
Uh WHEN is Jennifer Hudson singing???
Jessica February 26, 2007
OK, this may be really uncool as I don’t know the netiquette for outing an anonymous blogger, but I can’t help it…is that you, Jenny???!!!
Anonymous February 26, 2007
This is the worst Oscar ever. I am going to throw up. I hate Celion DiJon – this show is never going to end.
Jessica February 26, 2007
Did you see The Barbara Walters pre-show interview when Babs asked Jennifer: “Jennifer, your boyfriend of 7 years is a mechanic. Now that you’re in Hollywood with all this success, do you really think that can last?”
Anonymous February 26, 2007
Ok – I love Clint Eastwood – he is translating and abreviating at the same time.
Anonymous February 26, 2007
I disagree with you Ryan – Jennifer is going to be a big star – Remember the musical “The Life” – she will star in it as the lead and Best Actress nom is a show in. So to answer your question Jessica (via Barbara) no the relationship will not last. Don;t be surprised when you read Jennifer has shacked up with her director…
Anonymous February 26, 2007
OMG – Finally two hot presenters!!!! Hugh and Penelope – sizzle…
Anonymous February 26, 2007
What is up with that weird off screen anouncer with the pointless trivia?
Jessica February 26, 2007
Anonymous – see my earlier comment to Josh on the andecote voiceovers!
Anonymous February 26, 2007
Could “Little Miss Sunshine” go home with best picture?